Powerless and Angry

One of the most frustrating things about living in a big city is the feeling that I can’t walk outside without being harassed on the street at least once a day. When I first started experiencing this I found it annoying, but as the years pass I become increasingly furious. Not a day goes by that I don’t experience one or more of the following: cat-calling, whistling, kissing noises, intensely seductive stares, or pointed glances up and down my body. Contrary to what many men think, this attention is not appreciated and not flattering, and I’m sure most women agree with me. This kind of attention is not like being given a complement …it’s not like being told, “you are beautiful.” It actually feels horrible; it makes me feel degraded and violated, but most of all, it makes me feel utterly powerless. I feel as if my body doesn’t belong to me, and this infuriates me more than anything I’ve ever experienced.

This happens to me frequently too, and every time it does I feel like crying. It makes me feel disgusting, and I wonder if I’m doing something to attract this completely unsolicited attention. I even wear a big coat over my breezy sundresses on hot days, in the hopes that it will discourage unwanted glares or remarks. It really doesn’t matter, because the behavior has nothing to do with sex. I’m guessing the perpetrators are counting on the fact that they’re making me feel like shit, because in some pathetic way that makes them feel dominant. I know the only thing I can change is my attitude, because these pricks aren’t going anywhere. Still, it’s incredibly frustrating. I hate being made to regret my gender on a daily basis.

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"So when someone makes fun of me for: being fat, wearing “unflattering” clothes, looking like a man, being a bitch, having acne, not being polite or gracious, wearing too little perfume, wearing too much perfume, having gunk in my eye, wearing a t-shirt that shows my belly when I raise my arm, perspiring a lot or laughing too loudly… It’s totally personal, but then again, it totally isn’t. We all have a variety of unique and personal characteristics, and they might read a little differently depending on where you live, what you look like, how much you earn, the colour of your skin or what gender you are, but at the end of the day those criticisms are about hemming you in and disempowering you. I can’t even get angry at people who insult me anymore because I know most of us are conditioned to think this way."
- You Can’t Bully Me Out Of My Skinny Jeans - Definatalie.com - Jezebel

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